PIECE OF DAY

I've got 11 months left

2009-04-05T19:33:00.002+07:00

Start to think...

Maybe I don't belong in here.
Maybe I'll get out 11 months from now (I even smile when I notice that I have 11 months left, rather than 12, Hahahah...)

Start to realize..

I like the balancing things.
I'm happy when I have time for my self, my family and my friends
The unhappiest things in the world would be: lacking of memorable moment with those I love the most.
I'm not a material girl, I exactly know that money can't buy happiness.

Now I know,

That I'm not thankful enough for what i've got in the past. My last job, doesn't provide me with the career path, but they give me the best moment in my life, and meet me with the most gergous boss in the world and funniest co-work.

When I drop this job,
I'll seek for a job that giving me emotional stabilizer. That giving me much laugh and smile.
Maybe I'll be a playground teacher.
I'll be anywhere in local company.
Some kind of job that giving me less stress.
So I able to put my full attention to my boyfriend, family and friend.

Counting the days to get out from here.

9.59 pn

2009-03-30T21:44:00.002+07:00

Be smart. Be responsive. Be brave. Be bold. Be optimistic.

Leave the doubtness. Leave fear. Leave confusion. Leave the uncertainty.

Think fast. Think now. Think the result. Think all. Think happy things.

I am good. I am best. I am all that I always want.

I am great. I am bliss. I am that no one can even think about.

I am wonderful. I am a beautiful surprise for someone who have been waiting for me.

New Job New Life

2009-03-21T17:24:00.002+07:00

Starting last Monday, I effectively worked in the new place, in the new corporate with a new job position.

Now I am a Public Relations for LG Electronics Indonesia.

Pertamanya, seems like it is a dream come true. It's always been my dream to work in the multi national company and dealing with many people. So here I go, living my dream.

Euphoria selalu datang di awal. Semuanya serba menyenangkan. Gue menikmati bangun pagi dan pulang sore (di tempat yang lama, gue ngga punya jam kantor. Jadi gue bisa dateng jam 10 dan pulang malem). Gue menikmati baju rapi dan sepatu tertutup (dulunya, gue ngga pernah bisa lepas dari t-shirt dan jeans serta sandal gladiator kesayangan gue). Gue bahkan menikmati jam makan siang tepat jam 12 siang (well, tingkat lapar gue diatas rata-rata orang. Jam makan siang gue adalah jam 11 siang, ngga bisa lebih dari itu).

Di sini, hidup gue berubah. Pattern hari gue juga berubah. Mungkin memang sudah saatnya gue untuk berubah. Inilah bentuk hidup baru gue. And I love it, still.

Dan lantas, euphoria itu sedikit hilang. Di hari ke-tiga, gue mulai menyadari arti kata-kata temen kantor gue waktu pertama kali menjabat tangan gue "welcome to the hell". Yeahh.. hell. Dimana semua harus serba cepet, serba tanggap, serba benar. Semuanya punya urusan masing-masing dan they don't have time for you. Ngga ada ketawa-ketawa during the office hour, harus serius, ngga boleh maen-maen. Ngga ada becanda-becandaan ngga penting waktu lagi bosan dengan kerjaan. Keep it the joke for my self. I even have to mengurangi disabel suara gue yang cempreng dan tinggi menjadi lebih rendah (baca:berbisik-bisik) Arghh....!!!

Di hari ke-empat gue disini, gue udah harus nyapin media roadshow untuk ke Surabaya.Dealling with talkshow and media gathering in which i never been created before!! Panik, stressfull, bingung, ngerasa bego, semuanya campur aduk. Banyak printilan-printilan yang malah biking gue jadi jungkir balik saking ngga ngertinya. Ngurus bisnis trip. Ngurus tiket dan hotel. Ngurus invitation buat media, rundown acara, dan talkshow. Dan ngga ketinggalan: News Release!!!

Okeee.. gue pernah jadi wartawan, dan pernah dateng ke acara product launching like thousand times. Tapi kan gue ngga tau cara meng-organize itu semua. I bingung. Pengen nangis. Ragu sama kapabilitas diri gue sendiri. Mampukah gue? Gue takut, kalo nanti di sana gue akan messed up things. Siapa yang bisa gue gantungin? No One!! I really have to depend on my self. Hikss..

Then.. ada Renaldy, my new office mate yang bilang 'There's always time for everything. It's good to have some kind of fear, so it keeps u alert on details' A kind of shokcing line yang akhirnya bikin gue semangat lagi. Make it good, make it right!

Dan di hari kelima, hem.. actually I hate to admit it, but yes... I do missed my old office, my old office-mate, my old boss and my old desk. Gue kangen mereka. Gue kangen kerjaan gue yang lama dan hidup gue yang 'terengut'. Gue kangen, tapi bukan berarti gue pengen balik ke sana. I just missed them, but I don't want to go back. Emm... sama seperti kayak lo kangen sama jaman muda lo, but however you just don't want to re-life it. Got it?

So yestarday, I came visit my old office just to met my old friend. Curhat tentang kantor baru, dan hidup baru gue. Dan mereka selalu bilang 'Ini baru pertama-pertama. Adjustment time. U'll get used to it kok. Tenang aja'

Hikssss...

Anyway, now is weekend. Gue puas-puasin tidur dan nonton TV. Tapi jadi bosan sendiri, karena ngga ngapa-ngapain dan ngga ada kerjaan. Dasar aneh!

3 hours 25 minutes

2009-03-14T22:18:00.002+07:00

So now I'm trying to stop making any excuse for you..

Bukan karena lo nya lagi ribet,
Bukan karena ada temen-temen lo yang bikin lo sedikit sibuk
Bukan karena lo kehabisan pulsa,
Ato sinyal yang susah di tempat lo,
Bukan karena HP lo mendadak nge-hang,
Hingga sampai di putaran 3 jam 25 menit, lo belom juga bales SMS gue

Bukan karena semua alasan-alasan itu.
Alasan-alasan yang gue buat untuk diri gue sendiri, supaya gue sedikit terhibur. Biar ada sedikit harapan. Biar punya sedikit alasan untuk ngebiarin diri gue sendiri terjebak sama ilusi ciptaan gue sindiri. Alasan yang membuat gue punya logical reason to stay still.

Pathetic...

While, from that thousand of that excuse, truthfully, there's only one reason why you just don't reply it...

It is simply because you are no into me..

few words bout you

2009-03-05T13:27:00.002+07:00

You're far far away from me
Don't know much about you
But I like what I see
We don't have to judge each other
We could just be
We could just breathe
Maybe wait and see
But in the meantime

Would you mind if I told you
I loved you tonight
Cuz it seems when you close to me
It's gonna be alright

We've been in love before
haven't we
But past loves like past lives
It seems to me
We don't have to fear this moment
We could go slow
See where this goes
Cuz you never know
But in the meantime

Would you mind if I told you
I loved you tonight
Cuz it seems when you close to me
It's gonna be alright

Several things that ppl don't know bout me

2009-02-14T21:12:00.002+07:00

Here's the things:

1. I never lend my books to ANYONE. Not even to my close friend. It is because I had bad experience on lending it. Three times I lended it to different friend, but it was just the same; my book was disrepair. Once I even cried loud because the cover was extremelly damaged.

2. I dream about having a private corner at my personal house and create it as my library, where I can put all my books and CD's collection. At there, I'll let my kids open and read all that books and listen to the music at once.

3. I have many friends, but I only have several best friend that I trust. And I making friend with anykind of person. As long as I'm comfort with them, they can be my friend.

4. Since I was kid, I always have a best friend that looks better than me. But I NEVER, even for once, feel like I'm living in their shadow. They might be have better look, but I'm nicer than them.

5. I Believe in Karma, both good and bad. What goes around comes around. Thus, I don't need any revange. For me Karma is much sweeter than revange.

6. I treated someone like I want to be treated by else.

7. I hate being late. I'm right-on-time person. Making some one waiting for me is irritating me. Thus, I hate people who come late. And I hate to pick up someone who's not ready yet. What is the hard things about being on time?

8. I NEVER failed in my class. The lowest score that I got during college is C (Sociology subject). It was the only C that I've got.

9. I more familiar with my granpa and grandma from my mother side, rather than my parents. Thus, when my granpa passed away, I feel like I lost a huge part of my soul.

10. I've ever crying at the office toilet because of broken heart. A terrible one.

11. My first atraction was Pandu. But my first love was Ade. I like him for almost 1 years, since I was in 7th grade to 8th grade. But I had no courage to show or to say it. If I could turn back the time, I really like to say to him how much I like about him.

12. I never cheated from my boy friend

That's all. I make this, just to killing time actully, while I'm waiting to feel sleepy. Hehehe...

Grieving for Wildan

2009-02-12T19:16:00.002+07:00

My phone was ringing at early morning, when the sky still dark.

It was around 5 am.

I was still sleepy and still lil bit unconcious. All I remembered was Ajeng named was on my HP screen. She's calling for me. But I was toooo tired, toooo sleepy then I just ignore her call and turn my phone into silent mode, continue to sleep.

I woke up and noticed that Ajeng has call me for 4 times. I should call her back, but I did not. I straight went to bath room and prepared for work. As I arrived at my office, I was drawn into my job task. I forgot to call her back.

I was too bussy just to remember that one of my close friend has call me four times this early morning. I must be alert that this must be something important. Otherwise, she -a kind of NOT morning person- wouldn't called me when it was the time when she supposed still lay on her bed and sleeping.

I must be know that something just happened.

Around 8 pm, when I was enjoying a cup of tea, I remember to call her. I send her a text asking 'what's up dear?'

Minutes later, she replied my text and delivered a very shocking news. She wrote:
'Wildan just passed away.Please forgive him for any fault he did'

I dialed her number, and heared her sad voice.

Steadfastly, She explained of what happened to Wildan. He got brain infection and hospitilized 5 days ago. Turn out, the infection getting worse, and he passed away this morning. 2 hours after she found out that Wildan has gone, she tried to reach me. But I didn't picked her phone.

Yes I knew that it must be something happened, but I never expected that this thing would be this worse.

I ended the calls with HUGE regret. I wish that I were called her back as soon as I got up, I might had any chance to hear this sooner and would be able to be there for her. I wish I were called her earlier, she might be had someone to cheers her up. I wish I were called her ... I might had less regret.

Wildan...

He is Ajeng's 3 years boyfriend. They met in Yogya, where Ajeng went to college. I heard about him first was when Ajeng visited me in Jakarta. She told me that she's in depth relationship with someone that she's trully in love with. And it was Wildan that she's told about. She shown me his picture on her phone, and said that I should meet him.

Then, Ajeng linked me with his FS account. That was when me and Wildan recognizing each other. He's kind of nice and charming person, yet open. Really like to joke and discussing about anything. Although, we havn't meet yet, but I fell like I already know him.

He told me that I shuld go to Yogya and visit Ajeng. Then me and Wildan, can finally see each other face to face. He was curios about what I looks like, since Ajeng told him that I'm childish person with Chinesse looks while I'm javaness. I said to him that one day we'll meet but not in the close time. He promised me to take me and Ajeng around Yogyakarta and do whatever I want.

I though I'll have any chance to meet him and see his face, talking personally to him. I though he won't go anywhere. I though we have enough time living a life.

I never though that he'll gone.

Not this time. Not this fast.

I'm sorry that we couldn't realize our plan. Then maybe we'll met.. in other world.

May you rest in peace Wildan.

what women needs

2009-02-07T22:26:00.003+07:00

My dearest lecturer, Mr. Joe said to me -and to us, girl who were sitting around him- that we should stop to be very strict in choosing a man.

Sudahlah, wanita, semakin merek bertambah dewasa, pilihan akan pria akan semakin berkurang. Jadi, ngga usah repot pengen yang dan yang itu. Yang penting, cari yang BERTANGGUNG JAWAB dan yang mau MERAWAT kalian. Itu aja. Yang kalian butuhkan, pada akhirnya hanya itu kok.

HANYA ITU.

But still, I coudn't find that kind of man yet.

Ngga tau kenapa....

Why oh Why

2009-02-05T18:12:00.002+07:00

While we were sitting on Senci food court, one of my new friend throw me a statement (or perhaps, I could say he's statement as question, since he was wondering) :

Why people like reading? I do reading, but I don't really into book. I think I'm gonna buy one book and try to read it, and finally find what the enjoyment of reading.

That was he said.

And I just nodded, since I couldn't find what the right answer for him.

Yes, I do read a book. Even my close friend think that I lil' bit looks like geek. Hehehe... But yet, I couldn't bring the perfect opinion for that. So, I just shut my mouth down and tried to drive him into another topic conversation.

Truthfully, we all have the same question, doesn't we? I wondering why my little sister love to arrange her cloths in the closet every night, while I hate to do that ( I do it maybe only twice a month ). I wondering, why people like to smoke. I wondering why people like yogurt ( that silly food, hehehe.. )

Although I do arrange my closet twice a month, I still can stop wondering what the fun thing about arranging the mess up cloths every night! I even can not understand what's the joy thing about smoking, although I did it several times with different brand of cigarette.

I've tried it, but still I can not figure it out why my little sister did that or why people do smoking.

The same thing goes to read a book. I can give you thousand reason why I like read, and why people should read. However, you can not find it by yourself just by testing to read a book. It's called addiction honey!

As a newborn child, I can not read, I even can not stare. Then I could read, and arrange a sentence. But I don't read a novel, I read Bobo. Then a grow up, I read book sometime, but most of time I read teen magazine. As I become a young adult, I begin to read novel rather than magazine or anykind of books.

As a kid, you must be un-smoker. You know cigerette, and have seen people smoking a lot, but you did not smoke. Then you grow up, you get interest to smoke, try one. Now, you become an active smoker and smoking anytime you could.

People find enjoyment a thing not through one shot. Not only by one chance. Not by one reason.

Takes time to get used to it, as it's become major part of your life. Slowly but sure, your soul find the its enjoyment. Thus, the joy can not be defined by words, by single experience or even only by a moment of time.

Yeaah... I started to talk about crap in here. Better sign out now, and leave you with disagreement (maybe) or confussion (another chance). Hehehe...

The fact about you

2009-01-31T18:27:00.003+07:00

She said she's not much feeling fine by standing in the middle between me and him.
I said I knonw that she won't do anything wrong and betray me.
She said she's fight for me and him and thus she's doing this.
I said I know about that and asked her not too worry.
She said she's afraid that he just like the other guy who chase after her.
I said that if this man would do the same old thing, I won't mad to her and blame on her.
She said that she'll feel very gulity if that happened to me.
I said if he's fallen for her it must be because he's not that into me.
She said she can't even imagine if it comes to realized.
I said that i'm preparing my self for that awkward circumstance, but promise her there'll be no such thing like hurt feeling.
She said that she just take him as a friend.
I said that I know her well, and kind of man like him would never take her heart.

Beepp... Beepp...
Your handphone is ringing
You speak to him, while I'm sitting next to you.
You look so enjoying the conversation, neglacting the fact that you've just said that you can not being in the middle between me and him for any longer.

You said you hate this situation because it seems that I don't left you with any options. Well gues what. You'll always have option in life.

If you hate being around him or having conversation with him, just don't pick up his phone and don't reply his text.

Don't said that you hate this, dear. Because deep down inside of you, I know that you're enjoying, every inche of it, very much.

Why you always play the same game? The game that makes people adore you. Physical is only part of you, not every part of you. So, I hope you are grown enough to understand.

Beautiful Line

2009-01-25T15:51:00.002+07:00

I've found this line on Peluk (Rectoverso - Dee's recent book):

Seseorang semestinya memutuskan untuk bersama orang lain, karena menemukan keutuhannya dalam bercermin, dan bukan karena ketakutannya akan sepi.

I hate myself for being so impulsive

2009-01-24T12:17:00.000+07:00

BIASANYA gue adalah orang yang plan-based. Kebanyakan yang gue lakukan adalah hasil rencana sebelum-sebelumnya. Waktu gue masuk Mall, BIASANYA gue udah tahu kesana buat ngapain, apakah itu ketemuan sama temen, mau makan, nyari buku, nungguin 3 in 1 selesai, ato cuman window shopping aja. Waktu masuk CD store BIASANYA I know exactly what CD I want to buy (walaupun sering juga iseng masuk CD store, ngecek-ngecek new release).

I mean, gue HAMPIR NGGA PERNAH melakukan sesuatu dengan alasan 'yaaa... ngga tau, lagi pengen aja'

I'm not an impulsive girl, anyway.

But, this well-planed girl turn into a very impulsive girl yesterday...

Mendadak, gue kemaren pengen karaokean. Gue bilang mendadak, karena keinginan itu muncul di saat gue lagi anteng di depan komputer gue, dan sibuk membalas e-mail2 dari client gue. Pas lagi artikel gue baru 3/4 nya selesai. Gue bukannya pas lagi ngga ada kerjaan. Matter of fact, I'm facing deadline. Dan tiba-tiba aja, gue ngambil kunci mobil di laci dan ngajak temen kantor gue, Endah buat karaokean. Berdua aja!

Dia sempet ngga yakin sih waktu gue ajakin, dan ngeluarin tampang 'Serius nih?'. Tapi gue dengan yakinnya bilang: iye.. gue mo karaokean. Yaa.. dia sih ngga nolak, however dia musti ke PIM hari itu dan rutenya pasti ngelewatin Permata Hijau (daerah tempat kita mau karaokean). Nothing to lose kalo buat dia. Yang bikin dia ngga yakin adalah: boo.. berdua aja nih? Terus apa kabar kerjaan lo? Udah jam 4 lho.. Jumat pula, ngga takut macet? Ntar lo balik lg ke kantor, ngga capek? Tadi kan lo siang udah ke Simprug, kalo lo sekarang ke Permata Hijau, bukannya lo jadi bolak-balik dan capek2in badan lo aja?

Bukannya cuman Endah yang ngga yakin, temen kantor gue satu lagi (alfred) juga udah wanti-wanti. 'Lo berangkat jam 4. Sampe sana paling cepet setengah 5. Karaokean sejam. Terus mo sampe kantor lagi jam berapa? Lo kurang kerjaan banget sih? Emang kerjaan lo dah selesai semua?'

Dan gue cuman cuek bebek. POKOKNYA GUE MO KARAOKEAN!!

Bener aja, pas keluar daerah Benhil, gue udah disambut sama sorakan kemacetan. Jumat, Ta... Jumat. Ya macetlaahh... Gue sebenernya udah berfikir mau puter balik aja, kalo sampe di jembatan rel kereta api itu masih macet. Ternyata..ngga. Jadi ya.. gue tancep gas, karaokean. Masuk daerah Permata Hijau, macet lagi. Jumat, Ta.. Jumat. Ya iylaahh... Mo puter balik udah nanggung banget. Deket lagi juga nyampe. Jadiii.. lanjut terus laaahh...

Sampailah gue di Nav, Permata Hijau. Jam 5. Pre menelvon.

Pre : Yannceee.. lgi dimana?
Gue : Di Permata Hijau pre. Kenapa?
Pre : Hehhh???!!! Ngapain?? (Permata Hijau emang bukan daerah maen gue. Wajar kalo Pre agak kaget)
Gue : Mo karaokean sama Endah. Ini lagi nunggu Endah. Dia lagi jemput pacarnya. Kenapa pre?
Pre : Oooo... Gak papa. Gue tadinya mo ngajakin lo ke Atma.
Gue : Ngapain?? Makan Bakso yaa??
Pre : Iya
Gue : Yaa... (agak setengah menyesal. Pre sebenernya udah ngajakin gue lewat FB, tapi gue ngga merespon. Gue pikir, ajakannya berlaku minggu-minggu depan. Biasanya kita emang ketemuannya abis gajian, huhuhu... Tambah menyesal membayangkan bakso Atma yang yummy itu)
Pre : Ya sudlah. Enjoy ur time. Maybe next week ya
Gue : Absolutly pre!
Pre : Daaaghh... yance!
Gue : Daaghh.. pre

Setelah itu, gue bengong di depan Nav for almost 1 hour nungguin Endah dateng sama si pacar. Grrrrr.........

Karaokean sejam. Kelar jam 7.

Balik lg ke kantor dan jalanan macet :(

Di dalem mobil, dengerin Ecoutez, ngantri macet, membayangkan if I could turn back time.

If I could turn back time, gue ngga akan pergi karaokean hari ini. Gue kan bisa pergi kapan-kapan. Ngga harus malem itu juga kan. Jumat lagi. Gue akan stay di kantor, ngerjain apaan kek, sambil nungguin kelar kantor. Mungkin gue akan nelvon pre, nanyain kapan mo ketemuan. Dia pasti ngajakin hari ini. Dan mungkin, sekarang gue lagi di Atma, makan bakso, sambil cerita-cerita (baca:curhat) sama pre. Dan ngga musti kejebak macet kayak gini. Badan tambah pegel, musti balik lagi ke kantor, belum lagi ngabisin bensin (inget taaa... krisis global!!!! berhemat doonggg... spending less, ok?!)

Gue skarang lagi coba berfikir: Kerasukan apa gue kemaren. Kok segitu impulsivenya ya?????????

Is it worth gue karaokean kemaren? NGGA SAMA SEKALI

Kapokkah gue for being so impulsive? BANGETTTTTTTTT....

sigh.

out of reach

2009-01-21T12:40:00.000+07:00

Knew the signs wasn't right
I was stupid, for a while
Swept away, by you
And now I feel like a fool

So confused
My heart's bruised
Was I ever loved by you?

Out of reach, so far
I never had your heart
Out of reach, couldn't see
We were never met to be

Catch myself, from despair
I could drown if I stay here
Keeping busy, everyday
I know I will be ok

But I'm
So confused
My heart's bruised
Was I ever loved by you?

Out of reach, so far
I never had your heart
Out of reach, couldn't see
We were never met to be

So much hurt, so much pain
Takes a while to regain
What is lost inside
And I hope that in time
You'll be out of my mind
I'll be over you

And know I'm
So confused
My heart's bruised
Was I ever loved by you?
Out of reach, so far
I never had your heart
Out of reach, couldn't see
We were never meant to be

Out of reach, so far,
You never gave your heart
In my reach, I can see
There's a life out there for me

Things I really want to have

2009-01-19T15:36:00.001+07:00

Sentimental fool.....

Pengen jadi cewek ber-OTAK, yang ngga selalu pake perasaan kalau udah berhadapan sama cowo yang gue suka.

Pengen punya REM HATI, so I can prevent my self for not falling so deep when I'm falling in love.

Pengen punya INDRA KEENAM, biar gue tahu maksudnya DIA for treating me like that.

Pengen punya obat AMNESIA DADAKAN, biar gue cepet lupa sama yang namanya chemistry dan segala beutiful quincident about him.

Pengen punya BETADINE HATI, jadi kalo sedih, sakit hati, cepet sembuhnya.

Pengen punya KACAMATA BATIN, jadi gue tau mana cowo yang dalemnya beneran baek mana yang dalemnya brengsek.

secret admirer

2009-01-18T13:16:00.000+07:00

He is someone that lives near you. You know his laugh, the way his smile and the smell of his body.

You like him.
Yes, you do.
But, deep down inside of you, you know that no matter how hard you try, he still someone that out of your reach.

So then you play this game: stalk on him.
Your work day will started by turn-on your PC and open his FB account so you'll know his life or his day going. You check his recent status, you check his new wall, you check his new photo upload and even you open his photo album whenever you missed him.

You start to get obesses on him, and it's scared me a lot.

You said that I don't know what it fells like for having secret love. Well, guess what? I've been there and done that. I know exactly what it's like to love someone that much, while all I can do is see him passing by from faraway. I know how it's hurt when you love someone but he doesn't love you back.

I know all that things, dear. I recognize your pain. You are not the one who feel paralize because this stupid love.

I had once and I think, everybody have.

I have no suggestion for you. I'm gonna just sit down here, hearing you talking about him.

One day you'll get bore of this sick love and choose to leave him. By that time, I'll make a tost for you and enjoying a glass of wine with you.

This is a bad Monday

2009-01-12T18:10:00.000+07:00

I log in to my facebook, and almost all of my friends list has complaining the same thing today : A TERRIBLE TRAFFIC JAM!!

It's monday and it's raining. And you can figure out, what happened next in here, Jakarta. Yes.. traffic jam. The worst one. Grrrrr....

I went to the office at 8, and arrived around 9. It's 15 minutes longer than it should. Well.. ok, it was only 15 minutes longer, perhaps I'm too early to complain.

But then... time to meet my client at Jl. Juanda. Normally, I can reached his office on 20 minutes or less, but yeaahh... It was traffice that make me have to took 30 minutes just to get there. I got the driver anyway, so I didn't drive this time :)

Back from my client's office, I took taxi because the driver had to pick up my partner first, while I didn't have time to wait for him any longer. In the next 30 minutes I had to be in Kuningan, had a meeting with my other client and I haven't prepare the document yet. And it was took around 45 minutes, irritating traffic jam, and cost Rp. 30.000,- to return to my office.

Do I have enough reason to complaining so far??? I got enough of this fucking traffic jam, anyway (mad mode: ON)

Again, I took taxi to Kuningan. The driver still hadn't show up yet.

The distance between my office to Kuningan normally is only around 15 minutes proximity. But I had to go about 30 minutes!!!! Two times longer.

Thanks God, when i got back to my office, the road was not as crowded as before. In 10 minutes I had arrive to my desk. Fiuhhh... The bonus: I got the nai-cha in my hand (it's like thai-tea with jelly inside. So yummyy...)

It's 6.32 pm, and I'm still in the office and starving. Afraid to get home. Frightened of the traffic jam that I might have gone through in this time.

Pathetic.

So, I gues this is bad monday, afterall. Sigh.

I think..

2009-01-11T19:16:00.000+07:00

I think, some people are like to be rude, just because they want to transferred all the hurt and pain they've got in their life to others.

I think, some people are being nice, because they have optimisme in seeing life and have trust that 'good things happen to good people'.

I think, after gone many dated and serious relationship, we start to realize that material things and physical appearance can not change what we feel inside, but attitude and personality does.

I think, friend is quite easy to make, but to keep it is thousand times harder, because it's involved a lot of understanding, time, trust and caring.

I think, some of our friends is made to be with us only for certain period. We might not fit it to each other in the next time, and seperated without saying goodbye.

I think, it is important to have the type of our partner, because we will anytime he's arrived.

I think, all what people want is to be listened.

I think, we can not judge person by how much friends does they have, but we can judge them by kinds of friends their like to hang around.

I think, regret is good, so we learn to not taking anything for granted.

I think, 'all things happened for a good reason' is true. The problem is, sometime it's required long time to see what the good reason is, so we choose to get blind.

I think, people are all the same. We have some fear, we have some doubt, we have some pain, we have some hope, no matter how great they are.

I think, we don't like to be judge by our cover, but likely, we do the same thing to others.

I think, I'll get what I wanted, because I'm trying hard to get it.

I think, I'm happy, because I surrounded by happy people and happy family.

I think, I'm not that clever, but I'm not a betrayer.

I think... and I think.. if i'm ugly then so are you. heheheh....

Menumpuk Janji Bersosialisasi

2008-12-31T13:12:00.000+07:00

I've been bussy lately. Bukan masalah kantor (that work things just went smooth this month). But more, because job-seeking-things. As I told you, I've decide to cash my career outside my current company. Means, that I'm half job-seeker right now. My days had fulled with hunting job vacancy through internet, newspaper, friends. Added with interview calling in several company that I've applied.

Had no time to hang out with my friends.

Well.. Maybe I had, but.. I think. Gue ngga nemu waktu yang enak aja buat ketemuan sama mereka. Till, now..

Liburan panjang ini. Hehehe... Mendadak jadwal sosialisasi gue menumpuk. Tiap hari adaaaaa aja, acara gue hang out sama temen yang beda-beda. Hari Kamis sama Trio Macan. Hari Jumat sama temen Halim. Hari Sabtu sama temen sekolah. Minggu ... hemm.. sama siapa ya? Oh yeah.. My family. Terus Senen, sama temen-temen kampus gue. Yakk... si janji palsu (nickname gue dari Jerry) mendadak diuber-uber sama janji-janji nya sendiri.

Let see my Diary.

Day One : Thursday (25 December 2008)

First stop 17.30 : Renata's house

Acara syukurannya Renata dan Ramona, karena udah lulus master. Sama ngerayain Natal bareng-bareng.

Ki-ka, atas bawah : Renata, Danti, Gepeng, Disyon, Eja, Mika, Gue, Mona

Berangkat bareng Eja. Ketemuan di HokBen Tebet. Terus ketempatnya Kesya dulu di daerah Margasatwa Pondok Labu, ngambil HP nya Eja. Terus nyasar-nyasar di daerah sekitarnya. Nyari rumahnya Renata. Sampe ketemu perempatan, yang kita ngga tau mo belok kanan ato kiri. Dan akhirnya sepakat belok kanan karena... feeling kita berdua berkata demikian (bodohnya..hahaha). Sampe di rumah Renata dengan selamat (alhamdullillah).
Acara selesai around 9. Jalanan lancar sekali. Dan kita udah sampe Tebet sekitar jam setengah 10 an.

Eja : Mo pulang aja nih?
Gue : Lah emang mo kemana?
Eja : Nongkrong dulu yuuukksss. Mika mo ngga?
Mika : Gue sih terserah
Gue : Di Tebet aja ja. Nyushi yukkss..
Eja : Di mana?
Gue : Sushi-Ya. Mau ngga?
Mika & Eja : Ayooooo....
Sampe di deket Wafa, seharusnya kita tinggal belok kanan dan masuk ke jalan Tebet Barat Raya. Ternyata oh ternyata... jalannya di porboden. Means, kita musti muter lewat casablanca, muter di bawah jembatan, terus masuk dari arah Snappy. Muter-muter banget deh..

Eja : Eh.. kita mo nongkrong aja nih? Karaokean yuuuksss...
Gue : Mauuuu!!! Ah, tapi di deket sini ngga ada karaoekan Ja. Mustinya tadi di Permata Hijau aja. Deket rumahnya Mona.
Eja : Iya sih (menyesal kenapa idenya baru keluar sekarang). Emang yang paling deket dari sini mana sih?
Gue : Inul di Semanggi. Tapi mahal ah. Ogah gueee...
Eja : Nav?
Mika : Itu sih di Gading
Eja : Yawdah. Gading aja. Gimana ta?
Gue : Ayoooo....

Ki-ka : Eja, Mika, Gue, Taufan

Dan resmilah kita berkaraoke di Gading, sama Mika, Eja, dan Taufan (dibajak dari rumah sama Eja, hahah... nice try Ja!). Karaokean sampe jam 12 an. Huehehe...

Day Two : Friday, 26 December 2008

Innalillahi Wa ina Ilaihi Rodziun.
Fadel, keponakannya Ayu yang baru berumur 2 tahun 10 bulan meninggal karena kejang-kejang.
I fell like I have closeness with him, since, gue sering banget kerumahnya Ayu dan maen sama Fadel. The first things that came across on my mind adalah ... Ya Allah, dia masih kecil.
Gue dapet berita Fadel meninggal dari SMS - nya Ayu. Gue lagi nyuci mobil waktu itu, jadi baru buka HP sekitar sejaman setelah ayu SMS - in gue. Panik, gue langsung nelvon dia balik. And I don't have time to prepare my self. Jenazahnya udah mau disemayamin di rumahnya Ayu. Abis itu abis Ashar di kuburinnya.
Gue mandi bebek. Ngga sempet keramas, padahal rambut udah lepek bener. Langsung jemput pipit, dan brangkat ke rumahnya Ayu. Jenazahnya Fadel udah dateng. Tapi mo dibawa lagi ke Ciplak. Dimandiin di sana, abis itu dikuburin di sana juga.

Jam 4, jenazahnya Fadel dikebumikan. Gue nangis. Sedih banget. Inget lagi waktu masih bisa maen-maen sama Fadel (May you rest in peace, De')

At the same time, Bayu SMS- in gue. This night, he will celebrate his engagement with Afa at Belagio Mega Kuningan. Waw, what a funny world. Sorenya gue baru ke pemakaman, dan malemnya gue dateng ke acara perayaan. Kontras. Well, however I'm happy for Bayu.

Ki - Ka: Ulung, Hadi, Dety, Bayu
Afa, Gue, Angga, Bayu

Day Three : Saturday, 27 December 2008

First Stop : Pancious Pacific Place

I got the interview to be attend at Pacific Place at 1 pm. Sebenernya, Widya kemaren ngajakin jalan. Tapi terpaksa gue undur karena Ayu masih grieving. Pas lagi siap-siap, Widya nelvon gue.

Widya : Lagi ngapain lo nyong?
Gue : Lagi siap-siap
Widya : Mo kemana?
Gue : Pacific Place
Widya : Abis itu mo kemana?
Gue : Ya pulanglahhh...
Widya : Ya jangan dooonng. Ketemuan aja sama gue
Gue : Gitu ya?
Widya : Iya. Gue ngga ada kerjaan nih di rumah. Pengen ketemuan
Gue : Apa gue ajak aja si pipit ya, Wid. Ato sama anak-anak yang laen. Hemmm.. tapi ngga enak sama Ayu.
Widya : Yawdah, besok sabtu kita ketemuan lagi. Sekarang yang bisa-bisa aja. Ayo dong nyonnnggg
Gue : Hemm... yawdah deh. Gue ajak pipit coba ya
Widya : Ketemuan jam brapa?
Gue : Jam 1
Widya : Sip..sip

Ki-Ka : Gue, Widya, Pipit, Wenny

And here we are. The four of us. Gue, Wenny, Pipit dan Widya. Di pancious. Tempat yang selalu gue bangga-banggain ke Widya, waktu dia masih di Malbourne.

Second Stop : Sushi-Ya Tebet

Tempatnya tuh kecil banget (buat ukuran resto).Tapi sushi nya mantap banget. Mengenyangkan dan murah meriah. Enak lagi. Gue yang emang dari kemaren ngidam sushi, udah kayak orang kalap pas nge-order. Widya yang ngerasa udah gendutan, gak mesen sushi and stick with her teriyaki. Hahahahah...

Day Four : Sunday, 28 December 2008

Mustinya hari ini gue janjian mo Karaokean bareng sama Nona and Muthe. But something happened dan kita ngga jadi pergi. Diundur sih tepatnya, hehehe...Dan jadinya, gue dibajak sama nyokap gue buat nemenin dia shopping. Not interested sih sebenernya. Tau banget style belanjan nyokap gue, yang bisa ngider kesana kemari, dan end-up sama MAKAN!

Day Five : Monday, 29 December 2008

5 CM DAY!!! Hiyaa... excited banget buat ketemuan. Apalagi ini dadakan banget.Ngga nyangka kalo akhirnya pada bisa.
Hufh.. tapi ujung-ujungnya, yang bisa cuman Gue, Icha, Phu, Ticha. Pre mendadak ada janji sama temen SMA nya. Sempet kecewa sih, buat at least, gue masih bisa ketemuan sama yang lain.

First Stop : Soho Senayan City

Ki - Ka : Gue, Phu, Icha,

Duduk di sofa. Ngobrolin ini dan itu. Curhat sana sini. And shocking moment, waktu Phu NANGIS. Agak kaget. Kaget banget sih sebenernya, karena awalnya she seem looks fine waktu cerita-cerita tentang mantannya. Ngetawain centilnya dia. Sampai kemudian kita sampe di bagian, kalo Phu found out ada cewe yang kirim message through his FB tentang sesuatu hal that make us assume that SOMETHING happened between them. And she cried.

Second Stop : Sushi Tei Senayan City

To cheer her up, gue sama Icha mutusin buat pindah tempat ke Sushi Tei. Nyushi itu udah seperti ganja buat kita. Endorphine. Hahahaha. And it works.

Oia, gue sama Icha sempet beli over clutch yang sama di Dabenhams. Ticha kumat juga. Dia beli sepatu dan beli baju.

Ticha : Yan, aku pengen beli baju deh
Gue : Buat taon baruan ya tita?
Ticha : Engga
Gue : Terus buat apa?
Ticha : Buat dipake hari ini. Aku males pake baju ini. Pengen ganti. Temenin nyari yuk yan

Doeeennngggg.... Ternyata Tita yang hedon belom berubah juga.

Dan.. hari-hari selanjutnya, Selasa dan Rabu (hari ini), I prefer to just stay at home. Merecharge badan. Dan dompet juga sih, hahahahaha....

Two Girls Going Naughty

2008-12-30T16:36:00.000+07:00

That Friday, I went out to Plaza Semanggi around 3 pm. Lagi males banget di kantor, dan prefer kesana buat ketemuan dulu sama Icha. Kebetulan, ntar malem, Ecoutez perform di acara off-air ARH Global.

Abis makan gretongan di Cavana, bermodalkan kupon makan dari Zaki,gue sama Icha decide buat muter-muter mall dulu. Jalan-jalan, cuci mata, nurunin lemak di perut, hehehe...

Then, di satu toko yang namanya KAOS, kita berdua agak-agak slowing down. Pertama sih karena merhatiin koleksi kaos yang dipajang di etelasenya. Tapi terus pandangan kita merambat ke arah... yang punya toko. Cowok yang ganteng-ganteng amat, tapiii... menarik. Manis. Gayanya santai, seadanya, tapi he looks so damn cool on that green t-shirt, celana pendek dan sandal jepitnya. Dia sibuk menata dagangan T-shirtnya, yang menurut gue (ntah kalo menurut Icha), itu gerakan paling seksi yang pernah gue liat dari cowok (yahh.. selaen cowo dengan gitar dan piano-nya itu, hehehe...)

Kaki gue tetap melangkah ke depan, tapi mata sama kepala masih sepakat ketinggalan di belakang. Masih ngeliatin orang yang sama. Si cowok itu! Dan waktu mata gue akhirnya rela ngelapasin dari si cowo itu, ternyata mata gue ketemua sama matanya Icha (yang ternyata abis melakukan hal yang sama: memperhatikan si cowok itu).

Sadar kalo kita abis menikmati pemandangan yang sama, kita berdua ketawa-ketawa panjang yang ngga jelas. Berikutnya, kita sibuk ngayal 'what we would do buat kenalan sama cowo ini'. Of course, kita cuman ngayal. Karena kita berdua adalah cewe konservatif (ato mungkin cewe looser) yang ngga berani buat kenalan duluan ke cowo. Kita mulai ngayal kayak: 'Kita balik aja cha ke toko tadi, terus abis itu sok-sok cari kado aja buat temen kita'. Ato 'Kita pura-puranya minta tolong dia buat nyobain baju itu soalnya badan temen kita itu sama kayak dia.' Dan ide-ide gila lainnya yang cuman ngayal aja. We don't have any guts anyway.

Then Icha nanya ke gue : Kalo balik ke tokonya itu lo berani gak?
Gue : Ya beranilah. Cuman balik doang kan?
Icha : Sambil liat-liat baju di tokonya juga dongg
Gue : Berani laahh
Icha : Serius lo?
Gue : CUMAN KE TOKONYA KAN??? Kita ngga ngajakin si Mas-mas yang tadi ngobrol kan??
Icha : Iya.
Gue : Berani gue cha. Cuman masuk doang, hahahaha...
Icha : Bener yaaa... Oke, kita balik ke tokonya kalo gitu

Operasi ini bernama : Mendekatkan Icha dengan cowo penjaga toko KAOS!

Otw ke tokonya, gue sama Icha cekikikan melulu. Gilaa... kita ngga pernah segininya. Ngeliat cowo yang oke terus nyamperin??!! Ya ampuunn... mana berani kita. Lagian, kurang kerjaan banget sih; chasing a man, yang kita aja gak tau dia itu siapa. Ini bener-bener pertama kalinya gue kayak gini. Icha juga. The things yang bikin gue mantep buat balik lagi ke tokonya adalah ... It's a store. Tiap harinya pasti bakal banyak orang yang sliwar sliwir masuk ke tokonya ato sekedar lewat doang. In case, kalo nantinya we did stupid things, I bet cowo ini ngga akan inget tampang kita. Too many faces that he got to see for each day. Dan buat inget muka dua orang kayak kita gini, pastinya ngga mungkin. Kecuali dya punya daya memori diatas rata-rata, ato emang dia punya kamera kecil yang ditaroh di dalem tokonya jadi dia bisa muter ulang video gambar kita, buat ngafalin muka kita (in which, gak mungkin bangettttttt.... Ini cuman pemikiran gue yang parno keseringan ngeliat film psikopat).

Oke, balik lg ke cerita si cowok ini..

Akhirnya, kita sampe juga di depan tokonya. Dan tambah tersenyum lebarrrrrr sekali karena ngeliat Zaki (temennya Icha di dalem toko) lagi belanja dan nyoba-nyoba baju. Kita kayak ngedapetin dukungan moril dengan adanya Zaki. At least, kita ngga bakalan terlihat bego di sana.

Icha : Eh Zaki, lagi nyoba-nyoba lo?
Zaki : Iya nih, bagus ngga cha?
Icha : Bagus-bagus. Lo mo beli yang ini?
Zaki : Ngga tau nih cha, tuh udah ada beberapa yang mo gue beli (nunjukkin 3 tumpuk baju yang udah dicoba dan rencananya mo dibeli juga, ckckc... cowo yang suka belanja nih kayaknya)

Icha sama gue mulai ngeliat-liat gantungan baju di KAOS. Nih toko kecil banget. Cuman 2x2 meter. So, gue sama Icha gak mungkin bisik-bisik di sini. BISA KEDENGERAAANNN... Bahaya! Operasi kita bisa gagal total.

Zaki : Lah lo ngapain cha disini?
Icha : Tadi gue udah sempet lewat sih, ngeliat kaosnya lucu-lucu. Makanya balik lagi, pengen liat-liat (good answer cha!)

Icha mulai sibuk ngeliat-ngeliat. Gue anteng sendiri. Gaya make T-shirt really not my style.

Mas Ganteng : Temenan ya kalian? (Dengan ramahnya)
Icha : Iya, kita kebetulan nanti ada acara di Cafe Walk.
Mas Ganteng : Acara apa?
Icha : Acara off-air radio gitu.
Mas Ganteng : Oh lo kerja di radio?
Icha : Iya, sama Zaki ( nunjuk Zaki yang masih asyik nyoba-nyoba baju), kita kerja di ARH Global Radio
Mas Ganteng : Oohh.. ntar bintangnya ada siapa aja?
Icha : Banyak. Ada Abdul, Vidi, Sama Ecoutez juga.
Mas Ganteng : Yahh... kirain ada Jason Mraz, hehehe... (nge-joke)

Dan gue bari sadar, si Mas ini dari tadi muterin lagu Jason Mraz dari Ipodnya ditambah speaker. Nice taste of music. Dan jelas banget dari dia yang sing along, nih cowo ngga cuman suka karena Jason Mraz lagi nge boom, tapi emang karena dia suka beneran. Oke, point plus nih.

Icha masing ngobrol - ngobrol. Gue mulai bosan dengan pemandangan kaos-kaos yang harganya rata-rata diatas 100 ribuan ini. Mahal menurut gue. Tapi keren sih, import soalnya.

Dan masa-masa menunggu itu berakhirlah. Zaki selesai belanja. Icha ternyata ikutan beli T-shirt 125 ribu (tapi gambarnya emang keren abis, seleranya Icha banget). Terus si Mas ini, nyelipin kartu namanya dia buat Icha dan Zaki. 'Siapa tau mau ke sini lagi' katanya. Dari kartu nama itu, gue sama Icha gak cuman tau namanya dia, tapi juga NO HP nya!!! Huahaha... bonus abis.

Btw, namanya cowo ini DONNY

Sampe di Soho, udah ada Robby dan Aby (Icha's other friends). Pas pamer barang belanjaan, Robby mupeng. Pengen punya T-shirt yang keren itu. Dan gue sama Icha, dengan senang hatinya nganterin Robby ke KAOS. Buat beli T-shirt.

We're back to the store, for the second of time. Agak rame. Ada beberapa orang di dalem. Gue sama Icha, nunggu agak sepi. Robby udah duluan masuk, karena kalap pengen beli T-shirt. Donny lagi sibuk ngobrol sama pelanggannya. Dia ngga notice kalo ada gue sama Icha. Baru setelah tinggal kita bertiga, Donny sadar kalo ada kita.

Donny : Eh, balik lagi Cha?
Icha : Iya nih, nganterin temen beli. Dia tadi pengen beli juga pas liat punyanya Zaki
Donny : Diliat-liat aja dulu. Hehehehe...

Reeettt... Reettt... (HP gue bunyi) Eja nelvon, curhat masalah interview kerjaannya. And for the rest, gue ngga merhatiin lagi ceritanya Icha sama Donny.

But I saw the ending. Donny mengelus lengan Icha pelan sambil bilang 'Thanks yaahh udah mampir'

DEG DEG DUARRRRRRRR!!!! KEMAJUANN...!!!

Gue yang tadinya mo ketawa harus nahan diri buat ngga ketawa. Eja lagi curhat dan sedang sedih. It'd looks ngga tau diri kalo ditengah-tengah Eja ngomong, gue mendadak ketawa ngakak.

Di soho. Gue udah selesai telvon-telvonnan. Lagi menikmati Milo sambil duduk-duduk di sofa. Waktu tiba-tiba, Icha cengkeram lengan gue kenceng sambil setengah shock 'Dia lewat!! Huaa... Tadi gue udah ngomong gue bakal di Soho. Yaa... kenapa gue ngga duduk di luar aja' Icha menyesali diri. Gue tambah bingung. Kenapa sih?

Dan berceritalah Icha

Icha : Tadi gue sempet ngomong sama Donny, kalo gue bakal duduk di Soho. Terus gue suruh dia lewat sini. Buat liat-liat acaranya. Dan Dia lewat, ta!! Barusaaannnn...
Gue : (Manggut-manggut) Owwww gitu. Jadi dia lewat karena lo suruh (mata berbinar. Mungkinkah ini?? Jangan-jangan?? Aaa... Icha mo punya pacar. Akhirnya-akhirnyaaa)
Icha : Ya ngga tau juga.
Gue : Emang dia mo kemana Cha?
Icha : Mo fitness
Gue : Hemm... (Otak gue berjalan. Icha ngga boleh berhenti sampe di sini. Siapa tau tuh cowo suka juga sama Icha)
Gue : Cha, SMS in dia gih
Icha : HAH?? (Shock berat) ngga nyangka gue bakalan ngasih ide se-ekstrim ini. Lo gila ta! Ngga ah!
Gue : Ih cuman SMS doang cha. Emang kenapa sih? (Kompor mulai menyala)
Icha : Bilang apa?
Gue : Ya bilang aja 'Hey gue liat lo lewat depan soho lho. Heheheh...'
Icha : Udah gitu aja?
Gue : Iya cha. Gitu aja. Ini kan untuk ngasih dia pancingan cha. Dengan lo sms in dia, Donny kan jadi tau no HP lo. Siapa tau dia emang tertarik sama lo, tapi ngga punya no HP lo buat PDKT-in lo. Who knows?? (Kompor tambah panas)
Icha : (Mulai mengetik)
Gue : Udah belom cha?
Icha : Belom

3 menit kemudian

Icha : Udah gue kirim (bisik-bisik)
Gue : Senyum-senyum penuh kemenangan (Semoga ini dia calon cowoknya Icha)

5 menit kemudian

Icha : Dibales
Gue : Hah? Liat-liat..

Hey cha, iya nih mo fitness. Selamat bersibuk-sibuk ria ya. Salam buat temen-temennya yang laen

And that sign... Dessert... Kampret.

Gagal Icha dapet cowo. huhuhuhuhuhuhu....

Icha with her 125.000
Brand new T-shirt
Dari KAOS

That I would Be Good

2008-12-24T15:53:00.000+07:00

I have the theme song that I usually hear anytime I get low. This song was sang by Alannis Morisette. Yeah.. that rockin' lady (or not, hehehe...). I've heard that song many times before, but I never noticed the lyrics untill my friend, Phu, told me that I really need to listen to the lyrics. She even gave me a CD that played this song. In other words, Phu, had insist me to listen to this song. I had no option but listen to it, hehehehe....

Well, you -who's reading this blog at this moment- might think what I was thinking. What's so great about this song? And I'll tell you what. Every words of this song is perfectly describe on how your feeling about your self anytime you fell like you're in the deepest shit. Anytime you feel insecure about yourself. Anytime that you feel like you are just anybody. And guess what? It's Ok, and you'll be just fine. You have your own life and nothing can make it worse.

It's true that sometime you messed-up things, failed in your class, losing your faith to yourself, act like gig, or people might igonre you. It's Ok. It's normal. Soon it'll be over, and you're gonne be just fine. FINE. FINE. FINE.

We will be good.

I will be good.....

That I would be good even if I did nothing
That I would be good even if I got the thumbs down
That I would be good if I got and stayed sick
That I would be good even if I gained ten pounds

That I would be fine even even if I went bankrupt
That I would be good if I lost my hair and my youth
That I would be great if I was no longer queen
That I would be grand if I was not all knowing

That I would be loved even when I numb myself
That I would be good even when I am overwhelmed
That I would be loved even when I was fuming
That I would be good even if I was clingy

That I would be good even if I lost sanity
That I would be good
Whether with or without you

Trio Kwek Kwek

2008-12-17T23:30:00.000+07:00

Kita pasti punya jenis-jenis teman kan? Ada temen hang-out. Temen buat curhat masalah pacar. Ada temen yang khusus menangani masalah dunia sosialisasi kita yang lain. Ada juga temen yang tau kita luar dalem. Temen buat susah-susahan. Temen buat cerita masalah kerjaan. Dan masih ada jenis-jenis lainnya.

Untuk mereka, konsep pertemenan kita adalah: Teman sharing. Well.. iya sih, temen itu pasti jadi tempat kita untuk sharing. Tapi mereka bener-bener tempat gue ngeluarin uneg-uneg yang ngga enak tentang masalah kuliah S2 dan kerjaan.
How me met?

It's kindda funny sih. Soalnya kita masing-masing udah kenal lama, tapi baru deket pas udah di S2. Kecuali Mona dan Eja. Mereka emang udah deket sejak semester 3. Apalagi mereka ikutan eskul yang sama, Theatro.

Gue pertama kenal Eja waktu gue masih semester 2. Kenalannya bukan di kampus. Tapi di LIA. Kita sekelas pas udah di tingkat advance. Dan baru notice kalo kita ternyata satu kampus!! Bedanya, dia anak siang dan gue anak pagi. Pas itu, gue juga ngga deket banget sama dia. Cuman sebetas temen les aja. Apalagi kita beda temenan alias beda geng. Hehehe...

Ngga taunya, pas masuk penjurusan, kita masuk jurusan yang sama dan satu kelas pula!! Kaget dan ngerasa lucu aja waktu itu. Kok bisa yaaaaa???? Di kelas MC 71B itu juga, gue pertama kali kenal Mona. Kita bertiga emang sekelas selama 3 tahun di S1, tapi ngga deket. Mona dan Eja satu geng. Gue beda geng ceritanya.

Baru deh, pas masuk S2, kita jadi bentuk Trio gitu. Hehehe... Yah secara, kita masuk kelas S2 yang sama di hari Sabtu. Jadinya yaa... bertigaan terus. Butuh proses yang lumayan lama sih sampe akhirnya gue bener-bener bisa 'masuk' sama mereka. Jujur, gue agak-agak canggung pas musti bertigaan gini. Mona sama Eja kan udah deket duluan. Gue merasa kayak outsider ajah, walaupun mereka ngga pernah sekalipun memperlakukan gue kayak stranger. Tapi yaa... berasa aja, kalo pas mereka lagi cerita-cerita dan gue paling ngga nyambung sendiri. Huhuhu...

Sejalannya waktu, akhirnya gue udah mulai bisa jadi bagian mereka. Udah bisa curhat-curhatan dan terbuka. Udah mulai punya zona yang pas buat kita bertiga. Dan eventually, gue udah ngga merasa kecanggungan itu lagi. Lot of things we've shared together. I've seen them cry, dan mereka juga pernah denger gue nangis (karena gue curhat lewat televon, hehehe...) Pernah ketawa bareng-bareng. Pernah bego-begoan bareng. Stress bareng-bareng. Supporting to each other. Ngebagi masalah kerjaan, masalah cinta-cintaan, sampe masalah keluarga bareng.

Hal yang ngebuat kita jadi stick together adalah... ... ..., ntahlah. Gue juga ngga tahu. Gue nyaman sama mereka. Karena mereka yang paling bisa ngedengerin curhatan gue tentang masalah kerjaan. Yang bisa kasih masukan jitu dan advice yang bikin semangat lagi. Kalau buat Eja, Gue dan Mona adalah orang-orang yang bisa diajakin ngomong tentang masalah kerjaannya di dunia entertainment yang penuh backstabbing. Karena kita bukan di dunia itu, menurut Eja, dia malah ngerasa aman sharing sama kita. Dia bisa ngeluarin uneg-unegnya sampe abis tanpa takut itu akan bocor ke orang lain. Rasa aman, itulah yang Eja dapetin di Gue dan Mona. Sedangkan Mona? Hemm... gue belom pernah nanyain ini ke dia sih, cuman yaahh... menurut gue, Mona itu nemuin tempat dimana dia bisa dibantu mikir untuk solving problem kerjaan kantor. Karir. Sometime, I think she already knew what she's gonna do. Dia cuman butuh support dari kita dan second opinion. That's what she got.

Kita ngga perlu telvon-telvonan setiap hari atau chatting terus buat keep in touch. Ngga maksa buat terus nempel dan tau idup masing-masing. Gue percaya, di saat salah satu lagi butuh support, kita bakal nyari satu sama lain kok. Just like several days ago (the day when this picture was teken). Kebetulan kita semua emang lagi pada gundang gulana. Tentang kerjaan (lagi-lagi), putus cinta, masalah dating, dan lain-lain.

Dan disinilah kita. Makan sushi (dengan duit yang pas-pasan). Cerita panjang lebar, sampe sushi tei tutup dan kita diusir, hehehehe...

Kalo Mona bilang kita adalah Trio Macan (hahahaha...buat lucu-lucuan), buat gue kita adalah TRIO KWEK KWEK, hiihihiihihihihi....

15 December 2008

2008-12-16T22:34:00.000+07:00

Our graduation Day

Here we go..

The graduation day. Finally..finally...fiuhh...aaawwhh....

Lega? Udah pasti. Seneng? Ya iyalaaahh. Excited? Yoi banget. Tapi kok... agak sedikit sedih ya. Kayaknya ada yang berasa agak sedikit nyesek kalau inget this is probably would be our last day buat ketemuan seperti ini. Kumpul lengkap satu angkatan, satu kelas, satu geng. Semuanya dateng. Lengkap. Hemfh.. sepertinya ini bakal jadi hari terakhir buat bareng-bareng lagi. Setelahnya? Well yaa.. kita pasti udah sibuk masing-masing, sama urusan sendiri-sendiri.Gak ada lagi jadwal kelas, jadwal ujian, tugas kelompok yang 'memanggil' kita buat ngumpul dan terpaksa buat ketemuan.

Inget lagi gimana awal-awal semester yang hectic dan stressfull soalnya kita kuliah Master dan sambil nyelesaiin skripsi. Regreting our decision yang udah berani ngambil program akselerasi. What was I thingking!!! Dateng ke kampus dengan mata bengkak gak tidur semalaman karena begadang ngerjain thesis dan tugas. Lucky me, gue punya temen-temen yang baek dan supportive, Reza dan Mona. Ada saat dimana salah satu dari kita mulai ciut dan mempertanyakan 'can we get through all of this shit?'. Dan laennya pasti selalu nyemangatin 'Ayoo... bisa kok bisa. Kita pasti bisa lulus right on time' Padahal sebenernya mungkin yang lagi nyemangatin sedang mempertanyakan hal yang sama di dalam hati. Tapi yang namanya temenan, yang satu lagi down, satunya lagi harus bisa mompa semangat.

Gue juga inget jamannya penjurusan. Gue yang pertama kali semangat banget mau ngambil jurusan Jurnalisme, mendadak banting setir dan milih buat nekunin bidang Marketing Communication. Alasan gue yaa... karena gue suka aja. Bidang ini menarik, challenging yet promising menurut gue. Ternyata, Mona juga milih jurusan yang sama (untungnyaaa...). Cuman Reza yang akhirnya milih buat belajar Mass Communication (cinta mati kayaknya, hehehe..)

Yang awalnya kemana-mana bertiga, sekarang tinggal gue sama Mona. Emang sih, ada 2 hari yang kita jadwal kelasnya sama. Tapi tetep aja rasanya beda kalo' ngga sekelas. Praktis gue sama Mona, jadi lebih solid. Kita jadi kayak partner in crime kalo di kelas. Ngerjain tugas, ngerjain presentasi, nyontek pun juga bareng. She's been sitting next to me in the class for 2 years!! Kita yang awalnya cuman biasa di S1 (satu kelas sih), jadi lebih deket dan ngenal satu sama lain. Gue jadi tau kebiasaannya dia makan permen mint yang pedesnya minta ampun, kesenanganny ngopi dan sifatnya dia yang very details person. Dan dia juga tau borok-boroknya gue, yang moody, kadang suka ngga fokus, clumsy dan panikan ini. Heheheh....

Gue inget lagi, gimana temen-temen sekelas gue. Yang ngerasain gimana paitnya punya dosen strick kayak Mr. Marco Umbas. Ngerjain soal ujiannya yang ngga pernah gampang. Ngerjain presentasinya yang kadang narik nafas saking susahnya. Dan yang hobby banget ngasih tugas tiap minggu (sekarang gue malah kangen banget ngerjain tugas dari Mr. Marco, weird huh?)

Deg-deg an ngecek nilai dari Mr. Marco Umbas

Inget lagi gosipan anak-anak yang ngga pernah berhenti. Joke yang maksa. Ritual ngumpul depan espresso setelah kelas, ngebahas tugas lah, ngomongin soal test lah dan bla..bla..bla..

Ngumpul depan espresso setelah kelas

Inget ngantri makanan catering buat dinner. Inget chatting di kelas dan ngga dengerin dosen ngomong. Inget lantai 15, kelas pojokan dengan pemandangan jalanan Sudirman yang super duper macet kalo kita lagi kelas jam 7. Inget thesis. Nangis gara-gara thesis. Stress gara-gara thesis. Curhat masalah dosen pembimbing kita. Janjian di perpustakaan yang niat awalnya buat ngerjain bareng, malah end up sama becanda rame-rame.

Inget semua-semuanya dan jadi tambah sedih.

Waktu nama kita satu persatu dipanggil dan get officially become M.Si, kita semua punya senyum yang sama. LEGA. Ini akhir perjuangan kita yang selalu di bombardir sama urusan deadline thesis. Bikin bab 1 sampe 5. Bikin research. Begadang. Ngantuk-ngantuk di kantor. On-Line rame-rame jam 1 malem. It's over!! Done.

At the end, semua janji untuk tetep keep in touch. But I think all of us know, that it's might so hard to do. And I think we have know already, that this is it. We shall continually our life and started to forget each other. But I also believe that all of us would still remain each other, somehow, on their own way to remember.

Just read it

2008-12-16T18:15:00.000+07:00

BERHENTI

Dan berjam-jam kemudian aku akan pensiun menjadi tetangga merangkap sahabat dekatmu. Yang biasanya, akumulasi rasa rindu sudah bisa terendam dengan diam-diam melewati rumahmu dan puas memandangi pagar putihmu yang tinggi. Jarak tipis 3 cm diatas bentangan peta dunia menjadi kian melebar jika dikalikan dengan skala jarak sesungguhnya. Nantinya, aku harus mencari cara lain untuk membebat hati, jika sewaktu-waktu aku kangen kamu. Akan semakin sulit untukku untuk mengamati mu. Memperhatikan kerut-kerut diwajahmu bila sedang sibuk berpikir. Atau sekedar mengingatkanmu jika kukumu sudah agak panjang dan perlu dipotong.

Tidak akan ada kamu di saat aku terbahak-bahak kegirangan atau menangis tersedu pilu karena tetek bengek hidup yang terkadang kelewat mengecewakan. Tidak akan ada guyonanmu yang selalu berujung gelak tawa atau sesungging senyum datar tanda bercandamu kelewat kasar ditelingaku. Tidak ada segelas coklat hangat Dunkin Donuts dan seporsi tuna sandwhich yang dibagi berdua karena kita sedang krisis duit. Tidak ada tumpangan gratis kalau aku bangun kesiangan. Tidak ada lagi malam yang kita tutup berdua dan kecupan “selamat malam”. Dan membatulah semua itu menjadi sejarah dalam hitungan sekian jam terhitung dari sekarang.

Kamu, si embrio masa lalu ku, sekarang duduk di depanku. Sengaja berkunjung ke rumah untuk sepenggal kata perpisahan. Mengapa tidak di bandara saja, tanyaku di telvon sebelum kamu datang dan mengetuk pintu. Satu pertanyaan sederhana yang tidak kamu jawab selain dengan ucapan penegasan, aku berangkat sekarang.

Dan, disinilah kamu.

Disinilah aku.

Kita.

Tanpa ada tanda-tanda gejala akan sedang berlangsungnya prosesi perpisahan dua kawan lama yang sudah bersahabat semenjak kita resmi mengenakan bawahan abu-abu ke sekolah. Yang dalam rentang waktu sedemikian panjangnya, di tengahnya aku diam-diam mulai memasukkan percikan cinta di dalamnya. Semua yang bersangkut paut dengamu tidak semata-mata kulakukan atas nama sahabat lama. Lebih dari itu. Ada cinta tersembunyi yang kuyakini hanya berjalan satu arah. Yang meski begitu, tak lelah aku beri.

Walaupun aku adalah seseorang yang gemar mendokumentasikan hari, aku tak pernah ingat kapan tepatnya rasa bahagia yang berbaur dengan lara cinta terpendam ini dimulai. Atau mungkin memang inilah bentuk rasa yang berkembang. Pelan-pelan sewujud rasa sayang sahabat berubah menjadi bentuk rasa cinta yang mendamba balasan. Cinta dan sayang. Apalah bedanya. 2 hal yang kelewat absurd, seperti gradasi warna. Tak ada batasan yang stagnan di titik mana warna kuning lantas silih menjadi oranye. Atau warna hitam beralih menjadi putih.

Sepiring mie goreng tek-tek sudah kamu tandas habis. Kamu lapar? tanyaku. Kamu hanya tertawa hingga kedua matamu menyipit. Mengira aku sedang bergurau menyindir. Padahal aku sungguh bertanya. Tanpa maksud untuk bercanda. Kamu selalu salah mengartikan apa yang ku buat untukmu. Seperti yang sudah-sudah. Entah berapa banyak hal kecil lain yang segenap hati aku lakukan untukmu, namun kau anggap, lagi-lagi, hanya refleksi cinta seorang sahabat.

Kadang aku bertanya-tanya, pernahkah kamu merenung tentang aku, tentang kita. Pernahkah kamu sejenak berfikir mengapa aku selalu ada untuk kamu. Mengapa, meski ada pria yang lain, aku tak pernah menaruh jarak untuk kita. Yang walau semengantuk apapun, aku selalu sedia mendengarkan curhatanmu berjam-jam lewat televon dan kubayar dengan kuping merah karena kepanasan. Jangan katakan kalau kamu mengira aku begitu karena kamu adalah sahabatku. Seolah-olah kamu adalah satu-satunya sahabat pria yang aku punya.

Rasakanlah. Aku menyentuh hidup dan hatimu dengan cara yang berbeda dari yang lainnya.

Dan kamu masih diam bergeming tak tahu menahu.

Atau mungkinkah kamu tak mau tahu tentang ini semua?

Ini buat kamu. Sebuah bola kaca seukuran kepalan tangan kamu keluarkan dari balik jaket. Bola kaca yang didalamnya ada miniature masjid Moscow ditutupi salju putih.

Aku ingat. Sebulan yang lalu.

Aku juga pengen foto disitu. Ujarku spontan saat melihat-lihat foto hasil perjalanan studimu ke Moscow. Kamu hanya tertawa ringan dan berseloroh, makanya kesini dong. Percakapan pendek yang tersalurkan lewat ketikan keyboard dan layar computer. Dialog pendek. Hanya itu.

Dan sekarang tanganku menggenggam hasil obrolan singkat itu. Ada rasa senang. Tapi rasa bingung kian mendominasi hatiku hingga aku ingin jatuh meringkuk dan menangis sejadi-jadinya. Apa maksudnya, aku bertanya dalam hati. Aku tersenyum lebar dan berkata terima kasih. Tapi hatiku remuk. Aku ingin menangis. Aku ingin pagi lekas datang, dan aku cepat pergi dari hadapanmu. Dan berlalulah masa meragu dan bimbang lagi seperti ini.

Selalu begitu adanya.

Kamu tanpa umbaran janji datang membawa sekerlip mimpi yang bagiku adalah hujanan harapan.

Kamu selalu ingat apa yang aku kata. Otakmu seperti merekam tiap tutur yang aku ucap. Dan laksana peri dengan tongkat ajaibnya, kamu siap mengabulkan tiap pinta yang aku panjat. Salahi aku bila aku masih saja percaya ada sebongkah cinta yang tereselip dalam hatimu, menunggu untuk terkuak dan tersadari. Percaya saja. Tanpa embel-embel logika. Intuisi berkata, dan pikiranku hanya duduk diam. Meski tak pernah ku dengar kamu berkata aku sayang kamu. Atau mungkin, dirikukah yang sedang berhalusinasi?

Kamu memelukku erat.

Ini bukan pelukkan yang pertama. Namun ini menjadi sebuah pelukan bernilai historical tinggi. Setidaknya untukku. Mengingat betapa erat kamu memelukku. Mengingat berapa lama tubuh kita melekat satu sama lain. Mengingat, dalam hitungan jam, dua raga ini tak akan saling berjumpa untuk waktu yang entah berapa lama.

Aku diam. Begitupun kamu. Hanya terdengar suara tiupan angin kering kemarau dan hela tarikan nafas kita berganti.

Selamat jalan. Kamu mengecup pipiku pelan dan tersenyum. Semoga betah disana, katamu. Aku hanya tersenyum datar. Berusaha keras untuk menahan isak yang sedari tadi sudah hendak tumpah. Ini hanya perpisahan antara kamu dan aku. Dua orang yang tersatukan atas ikatan persahabatan tanpa berpijak pada komitmen cinta. Tapi ini terasa seperti moment putus cinta untukku. Mengenyahkan segala rutinitas yang telah dijalani selama sekian tahun hingga menjadi serentetan ritual, tentunya bukan perkara mudah. Harus ada proses transformasi yang mensyaratkan rasa kehilangan yang dahsyat. Aku harus siap untuk sesuatu yang tiada pernah aku minta

Kamu menutup pintu mobil, dan melambaikan tangan. Dan usailah upacara perpisahan kita. Untuk ini aku hanya berbisik dalam hati, selamat tinggal. Selamat tinggal untukmu dan cinta yang tersimpan.

Aku sudah lelah menangis diam-diam di malam hari. Bangun dengan mata sembab dan bantal basah.

Kotak dokumentasiku yang kujatah untukmu juga sudah penuh. Bola kaca itu, adalah benda terakhir yang sanggup masuk ke dalamnya. Untuk membeli satu kotak lagi aku sudah tak sanggup. Terlalu mahal harganya. Satu kotaknya saja aku bayar dengan tahunan penantian, sekian liter air mata, hati yang merintih, kepasrahan, kekecewaan, jutaan harapan kosong.

Sungguh aku tak berani membeli satu kotak lagi.

Sudah cukup semua.

Aku ingin berhenti.

Aku hanya ingin jujur.

Aku lelah dengan ritual sepiring berdua dan curhatan tengah malam.

Aku ingin membuka mata tanpa harus memikirkan sedang apa kamu sekarang.

Aku ingin hidup baru tanpa cerita sendu tentangmu, kotak putih dan bantal asin.

Sungguh pun itu harus kubayar dengan kehilangan kamu.

Si sahabat yang diam-diam aku cinta.

To : 0817*****

From : 0614***

I love you. Not as a friend, either best friend. I love you as woman to man.

Sent.

Dengan ini aku menjadikan diriku pilihan bagimu. Karena aku terlalu lelah. Atau mungkin terlalu takut untuk memilih.

Dedicated to sari: yang sudah menemukan sepotong cintanya yang lain. I wish you happiness ever after with him :)

Reading tarot

2008-12-11T15:25:00.000+07:00

Iseng-iseng gue baca tarot on-line.

I know, I know, it might sound silly or even stupid. But, heyy... it's just for fun anyway. Beside, it's freee!!! Heheheeh...

So here I go. Reading for tarot. Open www.free-tarot-reading.com and ready for prophecy. I should shuffle the card first and then focus on what I'm gonna ask. After that, I pick 6 cards from the deck. And the cards said that.....:

how you feel about yourself now

You feel discontent or uneasy and feel a need for a change in your life, a new direction, perhaps even an adventure. You might not know where you want to go, just that you don’t want to stay where you are. It's a time for optimism and major decisions - unexpected influences could have a powerful effect on your decision making. Ask yourself, is what you desire really the right thing for you?

what you most want at this moment

The cards suggest that what you most want at this time is success and achievement, and the support and influence of perhaps your father, husband/partner or a man of significance in your life who you believe could help.

your fears

You are feeling uneasy and insecure, something in your gut is saying ‘be careful, all is not as it seems’ - something just doesn’t feel right. If so, delay any decisions or actions until you have answered your concerns. If male this could signify a significant woman in your life being a bad influence.

what is going for you

If considering any new enterprise or relationship you will find the self-belief, confidence and ingenuity to make it a success. Perhaps a promotion or pay increase at work, or a strong feeling that if you were to choose to work for yourself, you truly believe you can make it work. Go for it!

what is going against you

Are you suffering in silence in an unhappy relationship or feeling very lonely? Do you have the courage to make the decision you really know you should make? You have a great sense of duty but are you happy? A difficult decision has to be made - have courage and you will achieve emotional happiness.

outcome

Whilst you are confused and fearful and allowing your anxieties to hold you back, trust that all will turn out well in the end. Things may seem tough or confusing but stick with it, its right for you. The Moon is a good omen if you are in a clandestine affair and helps guide us to open our minds to new and unexpected possibilities.

Kebanyakan sih emang bener. Right this moment, I really think hard about job things. I have plan to resign from my current company, but I still not employed yet by other company where I can move in soon. While, gue udah bener-bener pengen pindah dan ngembangin karir, dan ningkatin gaji juga sih, hihihihi... So yes.. it's true that I most want this time is success and achievement.

The false one is on statement about unhappy relationship. Things going fine with my relationship, wheter its friendship, partrnership at work, or my relationship with my family. Alhamdulillah... And I don't feel lonely or even empty, most of the time.

FYI, you can do this without registering. Just scroll down to the bottom of the page and click on 'reading without registering'.

Buat yang iseng kayak gue, silahkan coba. Hehehe...Lumayan buat killing time sore-sore begini, hohoho...

Cheers,

quiz trivia!

2008-12-11T12:49:00.000+07:00

I took a very intersting through e-mail which sent by one of my close friends. The result was very surprising so I think you should try it. hehehe...

Ready?

Oh ya, firstly, take a note and pencil. Because you have to write down your answer so you wouldn't forget what your answer is.

So .. here they are:

Number 1

Urutkan lima hewan di bawah ini, yang menurut kamu bisa mewakili diri lo. Jawaban diurutkan berdasarkan prioritas pilihan yah..
>Sapi
>Macan
>Kambing
>Kuda
>Babi

Number 2

Tuliskan kalimat yang menjelaskan tentang hal di bawah ini menurut lo (misalnya hujan : menyegarkan dan penuh berkah)

>Anjing
>Kucing
>Tikus
>Kopi
>Laut

Number 3

Pikirkan seseorang yang mengenal lo dan memiliki arti penting buat lo, dimana lo bisa menghubungkan mereka dengan warna di bawah ini. Jika mendengar warna di bawah ini, siapakah yang terlintas di benak lo (Jangan mengulang jawaban. Jawaban pertama yang terlintas, itulah jawaban yang digunakan)
Masing-masing warna dijawab hanya dengan menyebut satu nama orang teman terdekat lo.

>Kuning
>Orange
>Merah
>Putih
>Hijau

Number 4

Tuliskan angka faforit dan hari faforit lo. Ucapkan keinginan lo dan lihat jawaban dibawah ini.

Jawaban 1
>Sapi berarti Karir
>Macan berarti harga diri
>Kambing berarti cinta
>Kuda berarti Keluarga
>Babi berarti Kekayaan

Jawaban 2
>Deskripsi lo tentang Anjing adalah gambaran lo tentang diri lo sendiri
>Deskripsi lo tentang Kucing adalah gambaran sifat pasangan lo
>Deskripsi lo tentang Kucing adalah gambaran musuh lo
>Deskirpsi lo tentang Kopi adalah gambaran lo tentang makna sex
>Deskripsi lo tentang Lau adalah gamabaran lo tentang hidup lo

Jawaban 3
>Kuning adalah seseorang yang tidak akan pernah lo lupain
>Orange adalah seseorang yang akan menjadi sahabat sejati lo
>Merah adalah seseorang yang lo cintai!
>Putih adalah seseorang yang menjadi kembaran hati lo (heart twin)
>Hijau adalah seseorang yang akan lo ingat selama-lamanya

Jawaban 4
>Lo harus mengirimkan pesan ini pada oran-orang sejumlah angka faforit lo, dan lo akan menemukan hal yang menggembirakan tepat di hari faforit lo.

Believe it or not (but it's true!!!) hehehehe....

My2009 resolution

2008-12-09T15:30:00.000+07:00

Ini bulan Desember.

And it's time to make resolution. Hihihi... Kalo inget-inget resolusi gue taon 2008 ini, alhamdullillah banyak yang bisa tercapai. Tapi ada juga sih yang masih terkatung-katung sebatas keinginan doang. Hehehe...

Dan buat 2009, my resolution are:

1.Kerja.. Kerja.. Kerja..
Pindah ke tempat yang gue pengenin. FMCG Company dan megang Brand Management ato MarComm nya.

2.Bisa nabung lebih banyak lagi, biar bisa cepet umroh.

3.Punya kualitas hubungan yang lebih baek sama temen-temen gue (ngga berantem-beranteman, lebih ngertiin, ngga emosi-emosian lagi)

4.Bisa lebih ngertiin nyokap, lebih ngedengerin, dan bisa traktir nyokap tiap bulan, hehehe...

Done.

That's my resolution for next year. Emang sengaja ngga bikin banyak-banyak, biar lebih fokus ngejarnya. Kalo masalah personal up-grade, such as: lebih sabar, lebih dewasa, lebih bisa ngalah, dsb-dsb sih, I think I don't need resolution for that. I mean, mustinya.. tanpa resolusi pun kita harus bisa menjadi lebih baik bukan? Sadar diri aja, kalo sejalannya umur dan waktu, kita emang harus bisa berubah jadi lebih baik. Hehehe... Yah, itu menurut gue lho.

And about lovelife a.k.a pacar. Buat yang ini, dan khusus taon ini aja, gue pengen totally relax. Ngga pengen ngeributin emptiness, loneliness kalo ngga ada pacar. Dating is fine, but never much involved my emotion and heart in the begining like I used to. Take it easy aja, dan lebih enjoying moment buat diri sendiri.

Speaking about resolution, gue jadi inget sama resolusi gue untuk taun 2004 (which i mean, I made it on December 2003). Jaman-jamannya gue semester 1 di Bachelor. You know what my resolution was? Number 1; Diet..diet..diet.., number 2; excercise (gue bahkan nulis disitu gue musti joging 3 kali seminggu, renang 2 kali seminggu, and so on). Gue masih inget resolusi ini soalnya gue masih nyimpen bukunya.

Dan pas gue liat lgi, gooshh... dulu gue bener-bener mikirin soal fisik sampe segitunya ya. I mean, look at me now. Gue udah ngga pernah lagi diet-dietan. Not ever! Gue makan klo gue laper dan makan apapun yang gue mau. And I'm Ok with that. Gue ngga ngerasa 'duuhh gue gendut banget ya' ato 'musti nurunin timbangan nih'. Sekarang sih, cuek aja lah. Yang penting gue sehat. Itu ajah.

Dulu mungkin, ngejaga badan adalah segalanya buat gue. Yaa.. scara gue masih awal-awal kuliah gitu. Apalagi sih kalo ngga soal penampilan. The thinner the better. Tujuan idup cuman buat kuliah dan get boys attention. hahahaha....

Emang sih, skarang tuh appearance masih penting, tapi not everything. I prefer to be healthy rather than looks slim tapi penyakitan. Kalo gue sakit, gue gak bisa kerja. Gak dapet gaji doongg.. Gak bisa bayar ini dan itu.

Ketimbang sibuk ngurusin badan, gue milih buat up-grade otak gue. Banyak baca, banyak tau. Gue lebih milih buat jadi orang yang menyenangkan. Laugh and smile oftenly. Intinya, as I grow older, prioritas hidup gue juga ikut berubah. Apa yang awalnya penting buat gue skarang, mungkin 5 tahun ke depan udah bukan sesuatu yang pentes gue ributin lagi. Kalo dulu gue bikin resolusi sampe berlembar-lembar, sekarang gue lebih fokus sama beberapa hal aja. Yang penting I feel happy about my life.

That's the important thing after all, isn't it?

Soo... have you made you resolution today? hehehehe... let's share with me and leave your comment below. :)

Greeting

2008-12-08T22:43:00.000+07:00

Hay all,

Welcome to my blog.
This is my first blog that I announce to my friends and my pals.
Sebelomnya udah ada, cumannn... a lot of secret within. hihihihi

Here, I'll let you know what my life has been so far, and each day that I gone through. Antara penting dan gak penting sih buat dibaca. Makanya, ngga maksa juga buat dibaca sama lo. You can close the window at the second you think it sucks to read. Hehehehehe...

Sooo... Have a good read!